E-mail Mary Jane Marvel
Past Rantings and Ravings
01-19-11 Moving Back
11-03-09 The What? (a few years old)
02-11-09 30 years of Mondays
03-10-07 Happiness, Internet-Style
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| The What? (a few years old) |
Monday November 3, 2009, Mary Jane Marvel
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The Hollywood Walk of Fame allows mere mortals to stroll down streets of gold and worship at the concrete altars of celebrity.
Bob Hope. Zsa Zsa Gabor. Godzilla.
Yeah, Godzilla. It just goes to prove, you gotta be big to be famous. The Biggest Loser.
An endless carpet of stars rolling down the sidewalk into the darkness.
Slink past the wall-to-wall gift shops and their signs: “No photos with the Oscar statues!” They won’t even throw us a crumb.
At the end of the line crouches the huge church of scientology on the corner. Is that Tom Cruise’s face etched in the stone? Just another publicity ploy.
Celebrity look-alikes lurk in front of the Chinese theater. Bob Marley dubs my name into his rolling karaoke machine for a small donation. Johnny Depp leans close and mumbles unintelligibly, trying to sneak a kiss.
Marilyn and Elvis breeze by, walking twin poodles on pink leashes, dressed to kill. A short lady chases them, practically mowing down a man in a fur coat as she begs the duo to sing.
I step into Samuel L. Jackson’s huge cement footprints, pointing to his signature.
“This party’s over, Dooku,” I quip to my companion.
He squints at me through dark glasses.
“Mace Windu,” I prompt.
The what?
I guess he’s better known for Die Hard.
It all comes down to a collection of sound bites, and truth trumps fiction. Berating people on prescriptions easily overtakes anything said in Top Gun. Mission Impossible: the ridiculously rich and famous relating to the riff-raff.
No love lost.
Someone once claimed we all want to die in Hollywood..... but I wanna die harder.
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